Women Enjoy Relative Sexual Freedom this 4th of July

The news stories of the first week of July 2008 really point out the relative sexual freedom that woman has over her body and her earning opportunities.

We can have sex on camera and get paid for it and be considered porn stars. We can accept a gas card for expenses to get to a tryst and find ourselves arrested as a prostitute. We can receive $300,000 plus $15,000 for a car and get publicity in the press as a man's mistress for reportedly only 12 sexual play dates. This is better pay than Spritzer's reported sex worker received. What is legal? When is it legal? When it comes to payment surrounding sexual pleasure it appears to be very subjective and may vary by jurisdiction.

This story about a woman being arrested for accepting a gas card for sex disturbs me.

"http://news.cincinnati.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2008807020394"

Meeting for sex cost money and how a couple wants to divide the expenses should be up to them. Hotels, condoms, gas to meeting site, BC if needed, ED meds if needed, toys,lube, and refreshments all add up to expenses that require one of the parties to pay to cover.

If I choose to accept some financial help from my lovers for such expenses. Am I a whore? I have the freedom to meet for sex with the man of my choosing but not to accept gifts or money from him no matter what the circumstances?

In this case, the woman was someone police, who had set up a sex sting, recognized for another offense. They some how found out she had arranged a tryst there with someone else for a gas card and other gifts. The gentleman who agreed to give the gifts was also arrested. The police also arrested other women who agreed to meet uncover officers for money for sex. Since this woman was not the target the investigation, questions of how they learned of why she was at the hotel and what right they had to the information etc. remains a mystery. When is it sex for money or a division of costs of the rendezvous? Who paid for the room?

When I meet a friend at a hotel I don't want to be interrogated by police as to why I am there etc. If I say for sex; Am I subject to search for cash, gift cards etc? Do I have to get letters from people explaining they gave me gift cards I haven't used yet. Should I provide a ledger of my cash transaction to prove I did not agree to the sex for money?

If you have friends who would like you to come visit for activities that would include sexual ones should you accept the offers to help with gas, plane tickets, hotel and other expenses ? But it might be better to choose not to because you maybe taking a chance on a sex charge that would make parenting difficult, if not impossible. To be a sex offender is to be punished for life even if your crime did not involve children or violence.

In contrast, the Cook and Brinkley divorce trial tells of a girl who made thousands for just 12 sexual encounters. She has not been labeled as a whore or tried as a prostitute. She is referred to in the press as his mistress.

"http://www.wnbc.com/news/16767348/detail.html?rss=ny&psp=entertainment".

She counted ten sex encounters and he counted 12. In either case, it is quite a pay off. She is not being tried on occupational licensing charges or prostitution. What makes her better than many of the women serving time in Riker's Island because of the earnings as highly paid escorts for service companies that have been shut down in stings?

Athletes can sell their bodies for the pleasure of others but women cannot. Women who provide pleasure for money are thought less of and rejected by society. Yet many people in the general public have no idea that many who have been paid for pleasure are their neighbors, friends, and even prayer group partners. We deny for many reasons that sexual pleasure and desire for intimate contact is a need for most people. Rather than regulate and deal with negatives that do need addressed such as; sex slavery, sexual abuse during the transactions, establishing a sex worker bill of rights etc. We ban prostitution and punish even those on the fringe who really only may be splitting expenses. Why attack on line call girls? The transaction makes money for the hotels and does not result in street walking? If people are taking responsible precautions. If there is not a reported rise in STD's in the town with a sex worker being suspect what makes it an issue? If the hotel is complaining they can choose not to rent and set up rules to discourage the activity.

It just struck me reading the two articles how differently the sexual activities of these women were judged by society. Of course, the legalization of sex workers is a hot topic that no politician in his right mind will touch if he values his poll standings. But whether you are considered a sex worker or not may depend on subjective factors that you may not have considered. There are many women who have received gifts, reimbursement for expenses etc. from their partners and never considered themselves a sex worker that could be subjectively found guilty in some law enforcement jurisdictions and not in others. A woman's sexual freedom is definitely open to subjective judgment. Even in today's sexual opportunity era a woman's choices are restricted and punitive in their consequences. Many women struggling to make ends meet and to meet lovers in this day of $4.00 a gallon gasoline may not realize that by accepting help and gifts from your lovers you may been committing a sex crime.